Friday, December 5, 2008

ponder ponder ponder

have you ever experienced this convulsive churn in ur digestive system that make you go all sweaty and u know u can't let go of anything from the bottom cos obviously sum excretion would follow suit? u're not home and the nearest washroom is this moist, dark and malodorous cubicle right next to the kiosk. u park ur car thinking u've stepped into heaven, grab a pathetic piece of kotex left in ur bag and rush in to do ur bisnes, tiptoeing even with a thick-soled shoe protecting.

while trying to release, an unearthly bug earthworm climbs out from those rusty drain stoppers and works its way towards u. all of a sudden, the indon auntie that chooses to clean the toilet everytime sumone is minding their bisnes bangs on the frail plastic door (locked using a string tied to a screw) screaming at you for taking too much time. u're nervous, the door's about to break open and suddenly, the tummy stops churning ultimately!

u zip up, stare at the fucked up dwarf sized foreign maid ferociously and walk back to ur car thinking everyting's great. u happily stop by the mart to buy urself a ribena on sale, hop on ur vehicle, start the engine, push to D and then...the churn returns. -.-

it's just like working isn't it. there are the ups and downs. when you're inexperienced, the new environment is always clouded compared to home. and there'll always be this punani neanderthal that irritates the shit out of you and they ALWAYS appear to have the authority to do so. and when you're getting slightly used to the disturbing environment, the challenges come lke the bug. it smells fear. the more it piles up, the nearer the threat comes.

2 months back, i'd choose to leave. i'd rather shit in my pants than to digest all the pain and before doing so i'll grab the mop from the maid and yank it into her mouth. but now i've learnt to tie the string a couple times so that the auntie doesn't break open and see my shit half dangling before it thuds into the bowl just like how i'll take precautionary steps to ward off unholy beings in the office. besides, i'll pick up the skill to dart the only tissue i have in hand to divert the bug to another direction (or crash it either way i win) so that i can just shit in peace. i can have ribena as a reward and i leave the toilet a stronger and lighter person. *px folds arms - HMPH!*. and if the churn returns, i'll have pil chi kit teck aun la next time!

many petrol kiosks along the highway have depreciated and of course toilets oso dah kurang. so it's not wise to leave one safe cubicle i've found first, unless there's this super tandas like the one at the gardens kan?

if you dun understand...its just cos u're not at my level. u need to be on IV for a couple days, get ur blood tested and...u must love ponies and cotton candies at 22.


i drank a little champagne and wanted to write. it's such an inspiring tale of how my mind suddenly took a 360 degree turn after i won myself an orimpus camera. how easy can my mind be bribed?! O.o
it's actually pretty impossible to use the camera and take a picture of itself like some of you have recommended, did u realize? so if you're interested, google OLYMPUS FE-20.

i know i know...i was just lucky la. and after a couple months of bitterness i think i deserve a little candy for the tart-y soul! like this:

natural porn. pop them into ur mouth and...they're meat free! so healthy!
fuck i'm gross i know.

@ le meridean sum time back. i innocently believe that i've shed sum light pounds after the fever. my hair's much longer and...i need to lose more.

randomly, yearning for timtams even if it's not the biscuit literally is...unhealthy. tsk tsk. *shakes it off my mind*

on a happier and more 'undertandable' note, IT'S A LONG WEEKEND!!! CAN U SMELL CHRISTMAS ALREADY?!??! neither can i yet la but then oh well...syok sendiri a bit can or not? MV's GIVING AWAY FREE BALLOONS WITH THE PURCHASE OF A FAIRY COTTON CANDY AT RM2.50!! SO GO GRAB UR SWORDS AND UGLY CROWNS NOW!!! (tell the sissy gypsy u dun wan the pink sword. he seems to be giving the ugly tone to everyone).

i can now play lightsaber myself.
supposed to be xmas gift but...oh well. XD

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